Before we go any further let me mention the online screener I was sent had this note “Cannibals and Carpet Fitters Screener: this is a work in progress version as the film is still in post production. This screener contains temporary picture grade and incomplete credits.”
They shouldn’t have worried, it looks fine.
After an amusing and gory prologue involving a couple of lost campers played by Alex Zane and Jessica-Jane Stafford (apparently well known dj/tv hosts in the UK) we get into the main story. Nigel (Tony Nyland)is desperate for cash to keep his company afloat. Nigel jumps on a chance to carpet an old estate. However, the estate is the lair of a family of cannibals, The Hannings, looking for some fresh meat. Can these less than heroic figures fight back and escape or are they doomed to be consumed?
Based on a 14 minute short from 2014, CANNIBALS AND CARPET FITTERS aims to do for WRONG TURN, THE HILLS HAVE EYES and TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE what SHAUN OF THE DEAD did for zombie films and for the most part it succeeds. It actually works fairly well as a horror film, there are several good scares a couple of which actually made me jump. It doesn’t follow the usual formula of who lives and who dies and those deaths are accompanied by some very messy practical effects. However the script is full of wonderfully sarcastic dialogue that will have you chuckling constantly. Thankfully it also avoids the kind of slapstick too many films like this tend to overuse.
Director James Bushe has several shorts to his credit apart from the original CANNIBALS AND CARPET FITTERS including the well-received fan film PREDATOR: DARK AGES. He and writer Richard Lee O’Donnell have a bright future ahead of them if they can keep up this level of quality.
CANNIBALS AND CARPET FITTERS is playing as part of MidWest WeirdFest on Saturday, March 10th. Hopefully, it finds a distribution deal soon.