Jan 12, 2018

Strawberry Flavored Plastic (2018)
Directed By: Colin Bemis
Reviewed By: Madeline Milden

It is not often I encounter a film so dull it’s more irritating than sleep inducing. Trust me eating strawberry flavored plastic would have been more enjoyable than watching this mess again.

Filmmakers Errol and Ellis discover a serial killer named Noel and make him the subject of their first documentary. Noel finds out his ex from a few years ago had his kid and wants to stop killing and become a better per… you know the most over used trope in story telling by now. The film is styled like a very amateur modern day documentary, complete with long drawn out unnecessary thoughts on the work so far, and even a crowdfunding discussion. All the exciting things the audience is dying to see in a serial killer film.

I guess I could start with the characters. Errol is the lead filmmaker who takes the reins on this risky project. He is both uninteresting and confusing. The way he responds to Noel the killer doesn’t make much sense. Noel tells him once “I don’t kill people I know because they would catch me” and he just assumes he is completely safe. I’m sure Gacey told his victims the same thing and they ended up under the house… dead. Just days after finding out about his subject’s unsavory problems he happily drags the man over to meet his very young son and they jump around with sparklers? Later in the movie he goes on some self-righteous rant about protecting his family from the dangerous Noel to Ellis cause now that is a concern. The other filmmaker Ellis seems a bit more cautious and even takes some risks for the sake of the project making it big. He is the more realistic and likable character in this whole thing but sadly seems to be put on the back burner most of the time. Noel our serial killer started out interesting and reminded me of Kemper at first. He becomes unbearably annoying damn fast with is Manson wannabe lectures on society and attempts to sound “really intelligent”. When he goes off on some unhinged freak out he just comes off as a drunk asshole more than a threatening individual.

Storywise it’s a concept that gives you so much opportunity, but they do nothing with it. Noel’s ex just magically pops up after years and he now has a daughter. He just accepts this without any conflict with said ex about never telling him. After knowing he has this kid she is giving him custody because she wants to move. That’s how it happens. Oh I have a daughter, now I have custody, I have to become a better person. After this kid appears the movie really becomes unbearable because that’s all he talks about and becomes so one dimensional. Him being a serial killer is certainly talked about but we don’t see it. Noel kills a few people and the scenes are just laughable. There are risks but they seem so small because the “scary serial killer” is a pathetic child. The film was so awful that I was expecting to be hit with some real twists at the end to make it worth my while. Spoiler Alert: Nope.

I won’t tell anyone not to watch a movie cause my agonizing nightmare might make your top ten list. I won’t be subjecting myself to this one again. Just dull, pointless, confusing and some of the most unrealistic characters to hit the screen.